We will always treat others the way we do and are willing to treat ourselves.
If you condemn someone who loses their marbles when they're weak, hurt, broken and/or pressured, then you will be condemned, and condemn yourself, for your own weakness, hurt, brokenness and/or pressured times.
I made this mistake myself very recently...I am very hard on myself, traditionally, giving my insecurities and weaknesses no mercy or quarter. I have however been fortunate enough to have learned from this, and taken every available opportunity to seek forgiveness and to make it right.
If you wait for a person who remains - or like to think they remain - unaffected by their difficulties, then all you are doing is waiting for a person who will remain unaffected by love, and so will not love you.
Calling anxiety 'head' and excitement 'heart' won’t make it any easier should the awful day come where one chooses to let their ‘head catch up to your heart.’ These two should always be in balance. Anxiety always goes against the natural flow and causes pain, no matter how it is dressed up.
Putting effort into – or caring about – the people who hurt you should only be taken so far, proportionate to the pain they have imposed on you. Even the strongest love for someone should not, because it can not, be extended to someone after they rip out your guts.
In doing so they give you the gift of showing plainly their regard for you and for themselves. There must come a point where your love must learn to become strong enough to wash your hands, accept, and feel sorry for what they have chosen to be.
Hope that love will win the day, that truth will win in the end, and all that, if that's what you want, but at this point, the only way that's ever going to happen is if you allow what is to be what it is. Even if it's the hardest thing you've ever had to do.
Pain teaches; wild adventure builds character.
This is the challenge, not the reward.
For we will always treat others the way we do and are willing to treat ourselves.